Grief
by Nairobi-Harper
Summary: Reptar was gone, and there wasn't anything that anyone could do about it.


Author's note: I came up with this idea after re-watching "Curse of Reptar" today. I knew that Tommy couldn't have immediately gotten over the disappearance of Reptar, because he loved Reptar dearly. Maybe it's just the age difference, but I really didn't think that the episode showed this well. Not saying that it was horrid to the point of "All Broke Up" (my least favorite episode of the series,) though that was just one of my pet peeves about this episode. Aside from that and a few other things, I think that it could pass as a… somewhat good episode. Maybe it's just the flashbacks from their baby days talking.

I'm also very sorry if this doesn't seem heartbreaking. I'm never that good at writing depressing stories.

By the way, yes, I'm still trying to work on 'Kimi's start,' 'No Girls Allowed,' and a story that I've recently begun planning, in which I'll use celrock's OC, Silvia, for the first time. I hope to release that story in either October or November.

Disclaimer: I do not own Rugrats. The wonderful series belongs to Klasky Csupo, and hopefully not Nickelodeon if it does receive a revival. Along with that, the fantastic Alphi belongs to celrock.

 **Grief**

He could hardly believe it when his father walked inside, mud on his clothes and absolutely drenched from the hard rain. None of that was important, though. The very first thing that he noticed was that Stu didn't have Reptar in his hands.

He would've begun howling, though his instincts told him that Reptar was still there. Stu would never come home without finding Reptar. He loved Tommy too much. Didn't he?

At least, this was what the toddler attempted to convince himself as he sat there, persistence in his eyes.

Once Stu tiredly put the car keys down on the counter, Tommy knew that he was only lying to himself.

However, he still imagined a few good case scenarios where either a neighbor came to their door with a clean, shiny, Reptar, in their hands, or it turned out that he had only briefly lost Reptar during the last game of Hide and Seek that he'd played with his friends.

Tommy directed his eyes upwards at his parents once Didi scurried into the room, with Dil in her arms. Dil was giggling, and Tommy could only wonder how Dil could be happy in a crisis like this.

The two adults seemed to be whispering about something. Because he was much too far away, Tommy couldn't understand, which only made him more anxious to find out.

Using the word that he'd spoken recently, he decided that this was the perfect time to address the issue.

"Reptar?" He asked persistently.

With the answer that came next, all of his hope crashed.

Stu bent down, a look of empathy in his eyes, as he frowned.

"I'm sorry, champ."

Once this news was announced, Tommy didn't begin howling immediately as his parents had expected. He sat for a few moments, silent though clearly extremely upset.

The howl that came out next proved to be high-pitched and truthful.

Lacking understanding of the situation, Dil began sobbing, though his sobs were much quieter than Tommy's loud howl.

Didi tried her very best to calm Tommy down, though she knew that there might as well have been any point in trying.

Once it dawned on her that telling him that they'd find him a new toy was unhelpful, she sighed and took him into his room to put him inside of his crib.

She'd read a few weeks before in Dr. Lipschitz that he'd tire himself out from screaming and crying, which was why any further attempts might end unsuccessful.

Though she felt bad about it, she put him down in his crib, which had enough space for him to scream and kick as much as he wanted.

It appeared that her theories had been correct, as he continued with his screams and kicks for a few more minutes before the poor toddler had tired himself all out.

There he laid, his tiny bits of purple hair disorderly. He could've cared less. All that he cared about, all that he wanted – was Reptar.

Reptar had been everything to him. If he was feeling down, Reptar was there. If he was in an argument with his friends or Angelica, Reptar was there. The toddler had barely realized how much he cared about Reptar until now… and now he couldn't have Reptar. Not _his_ Reptar.

He wasn't sure why, though he glanced at Alphi, that stuffed bear that Chuckie had gotten him for his second birthday.

'Maybe it's time to move on.'

Of course, he was angry with himself for thinking this. He liked Alphi, though he was sure that any love of his that grew for Alphi could never compare to his love for Reptar.

To prove this point to himself, he did something rather bold for a boy his age. He unlocked the crib with his screwdriver, before getting up and out. Once he was out, he glared at Alphi. With as much rage as he could muster, he knocked Alphi off the table, throwing the bear to the ground, along with a stack of cards.

He stared at the wall for a second, telling himself that Alphi could never live up to Reptar.

Once he looked back down, however, the glare on his face disappeared. It was replaced with regret for his actions.

The toddler began sobbing, curling himself up into a ball, just as he had seen in the movies.

'I feel miserable,' He thought.

Usually, he would've cared, because he was Tommy Pickles. This certainly wasn't one of those times.

He yawned once he'd stopped sobbing and hiccupping.

Tommy was about go back into his crib, though he glanced back down at Alphi first. Poor bear. He was still lying there on the floor.

'You care about Alphi more than that, and you know it.'

Slowly though surely, he leaned down to pick Alphi back up. Once he'd completed the action, he stared long and hard at the bear, before deciding that he was just fine.

Somewhat miserably, Tommy unlocked the crib with his screwdriver, and slowly crawled inside to assure that he wouldn't drop Alphi.

If it weren't for his loss of Reptar, he might've given Alphi a heartwarming smile. He didn't. Instead, he grabbed a blanket for he and Alphi to share. Tommy noted that this was exactly what he had done with Reptar, though he took no time to cry about it. His eyes hurt enough already.

With his cracked, rigid, voice, Tommy whispered to Alphi.

"I'm sorry," He whispered. "I just lost Reptar, and I feeled really bad about it."

After saying these words, he sighed, just as his parents often did.

"Alphi, I don't know much about this world. Like, I don't know why some kids don't have mommies and daddies, or why some people are so mean, or even why I losted Reptar. I do know one thing, though."

Just as Angelica did with Cynthia, he pretended that Alphi had asked what he knew.

"I know that I'm the most miserable kid on the planet."

Once again, he curled up into a ball on his side, hugging Alphi.

"Oh, and also that I'm gonna protect you in a way that I never did with Reptar. I'm going to make sure that I never lose you, Alphi. I promise."


End file.
